I love words.
Especially words with multiple meanings.
So when we started making this sweet horizontal bar necklace I wanted to make one with just the right word.
I spent some time thinking about a word that had dimension to it. That meant something more than just the first meaning that comes to mind.
When it came to me I knew it was mine.
As an adopted child I was always told that I was chosen. My parents chose me to be theirs. And sometimes that was cool. They did a good job of loving me unconditionally, and my mother and brother were both adopted too so I was in the right club. That someone chose me, after all, was enough when I was little. It took until 11 or 12 until I realized that being chosen meant that my biological parents chose me not. Hmmm.
There were plenty of things during the ensuing years, teenage and beyond, that cemented the unchosen in me. I unknowingly over time let being not chosen define me. It was the squeakiest wheel inside of me and I worked REALLY HARD to be the kind of person no one could possibly not choose. Perfectionism was the poison that drip. drip. dripped into my marriage, parenting and friendships. Exhausted to be accepted, I organized date nights, playdates, meals for families that needed one, etc… All noble enough but never really done with any motivation other than gaining importance for myself at the heart of it. Then it all began to unravel in big and small ways and the controlling compulsion that drove me broke down in a puddle of “I can’t do this anymore and why did no one play along with me”???
That’s when I was chosen again. When I found out that God chooses us all. He creates, loves and CHOOSES us to be a part of His amazing family. This family full of all types of broken-but-loved-dearly people that ACCEPTED me most when I was just being me. Silly me. Lazy me. Grumpy me. Tired me. No make-up me. Can’t control a single thing me. And this family just took me in and had space for infinitely more tired souls. And there was more unconditional love than I could even take in. No earning your way into this family though, you just fall into it, spent and ready for a new adventure just being you.
Chosen. That’s my word. I love what it means to me. What it means for everyone.
There’s a song by Hawk Nelson called “Words”. I love the lyrics, you can hear it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anVweXDcxhA
What’s your word?